I think I have officially had it!!! I am so sick and tired of seeing demeaning comments by both Stay-at-home Moms and Working Moms. It’s just ridiculous. Guess what everybody, being a mom is hard no matter what. And I don’t just mean being a biological mom, I am referring to being a stepmom, being a stay-at-home mom, being a working mom, being a single mom … and every other category that people seem to want to classify moms into. Continue reading
I consider myself an extremely lucky woman. I have been a stepmom (or bonus mom) twice. In my first marriage, I had two beautiful step-kids, one girl and one boy. They are now 18 and 23, and have turned out to be such amazing young adults.
In my current marriage, I have two more sweet and beautiful step-kids, again one boy and one girl. I can’t tell you in words how much I love all four kids. They have all brought me so much joy.
Whether you are a stepmom or stepdad, a girlfriend or boyfriend, this role is so important in a child’s life. In both of my marriages and also in other relationships, I have dealt with many different ex-significant others. I have learned a lot and know I need to continue learning everyday.
With a lot of thought and advice, I have come up with 10 Steps to Being a Good Stepmom. Obviously, there is no one way to be a good stepmom or stepdad, but these are things that have guided me. I may not have been the best, but I did my best and don’t regret how I loved and love my step-kids.
I remember being pregnant with my son, all the excitement and eagerness for his arrival. I knew it was going to be a lot of work, but was actually kind of excited about the sleepless nights and changing diapers. I know it sounds weird, but I really was. But what really shocked me as a new mom, were the amount of things that nobody told me about. So for all of you new or expecting moms out there, here is my list of the Top Things Nobody Tells New Moms.
Breastfeeding Is Hard
Don’t completely believe the published numbers for successful breastfeeding mothers. If you look at 2014 CDC Breastfeeding Report Card, it is reported that approximately 80% of all new mother’s breastfeed. When I looked at that number, I said to myself, of course I’m going to breastfeed. It can’t be that hard if 80% of women do it, and for the state I live in it’s closer to 92%. But that is usually where most articles stop. So, when I couldn’t produce enough milk and stopped breastfeeding after a short time, I felt like a complete failure. (I did have some extenuating circumstances, but that will be for another post.) When you look deeper into the numbers, it really is a different story. Continue reading
Charlize Aubrey was born on January 17, 2017, at AM. She was 8 lbs 4 oz and 20 inches long.
Letters written on January 4, 2017
With my due date rapidly approaching, like many pregnant women, I am filled with anxiety and excitement. In just a few days (possibly sooner), I get to meet my baby girl.
Will I be a good example for a baby girl?
Can I spread myself thin enough to give all the kids the attention they need?
Will my toddler feel abandoned by me?
Will baby girl get the one on one attention she deserves?
There are so many questions swimming around my head. I have no answers but I have many prayers and promises in my heart.
I am so excited to meet you. You are about to become part of such a wonderful and loving family. I promise to love you with all of my heart. I promise to never treat you like a second child, fourth child or even sixth child. I promise to be excited for each and every one of your firsts, because you are special and important.
With every sleepless night and poopy diaper, I will remember that these moments are fleeting. I will cherish every tear you and I shed, and each moment I get to share with you.
Today, you are in my tummy. Tomorrow you will be in my arms. And in a blink of an eye, you will be asking to borrow my car keys.
I will pray for you daily and worry about you every moment of every day. I love you so much already. And know that my love for you will only grow. I promise to be the best mommy I can be. I promise to love you with each and every breath.
With every giggle and each impish smile, my love for you grows and grows. From the moment I held you in my arms, you had my heart. With every tear I have shed, I have learned how to be a better mom. Thank you for putting up with me and learning along with me.
I love your adventurous spirit and your kind soul. From your mischievous smile to your perfect little toes, you are growing up so quickly. Please remember you will always be my little man, and I will forever call you my precious cargo.
Although you are becoming a big brother, you are no less my baby boy. I look forward to seeing all of your firsts and being there to wipe away every tear. I love you and feel so lucky to be your mom.
After 9 months of mood swings, weight gain and pure exhaustion, my little boy is now here with me. For many women, like me, I received three months of maternity leave. Thank goodness I had AFLAC short term disability and had enough saved sick time, otherwise we would have been hurting financially. The miracle of birth is expensive!
I was told by many people that the three months would fly by, and boy were they right. After the pain of a C-section, emergency surgery for my newborn at 4 weeks, dealing with insurance issues and having the flu go through the house of five, the three months vanished before my eyes. Now it was time to go back to work.
As the date crept up, I kept thinking how can I go back to work? I have been waiting all of my life for this baby, and now I am going to back to 60 hours a week?