My Word for 2018

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What is your word for 2018?  Do you have a word that you want to set the tone for the entire year? I guess in the last few years, it’s been a popular thing. The late bloomer that I am, I just learned about it a few days ago.

I took a little time to really look at what I wanted to achieve in 2018, and what were my biggest obstacles.  When I really looked closely I realized that I was my biggest obstacle.  Yes, that’s what I said, it’s me.  So with a little soul searching, I came up with my word, Courage.

Dictionary.com defines courage as the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger without fear; bravery.  To have the courage of one’s convictions, to act in accordance with one’s beliefs, especially in spite of criticism.  

That is very powerful to me.  Courage and bravery, the two words that I want to instill in my kids and characteristics that I want to be visible in how I live my life.  But sad to say, these are not words that I think define me yet.  I hope to change that in 2018.

People who meet me for the first time would never guess that inside I am filled with fear. Outwardly, I am an outgoing and social person, usually with a smile on my face.  In the business world, I used fear as almost a challenge.  If I could beat my fear, then I could be the most successful manager, in all areas.  My successes led to rewards and promotions, which made me more confident in my skill set.  Basically, I like knowing I am good at something.

But outside of work, that’s an entirely different world to me.  I am an introvert with extrovert tendencies, which means I like to be around others and do things that I know and like, but the unknown is uncomfortable.

So in 2018, I want to have the courage to not let fear overtake my life.  The fear of failure and letting others down around me, can be all encompassing.

I want to have the courage to …

    • leave the past in the past.  At times I can almost paralyze myself with fear, thinking of the wrongs that have been done to me in the past.
    • write.  I might not be great at it, but it has always been something that I have enjoyed and it calms me.  I have so many ideas in my head sometimes, it feels great to just write it down and maybe share.
    • have a hobby.  Hobbies seem like a luxury at this point in my life, but I need the courage to find enjoyment outside of my family life.  I highly recommend reading The Pie Life: A Guilt-Free Recipe For Success and Satisfaction.
    • go back to work full time, whatever that might be.  I am ready to not just be a wife and mom.  To be honest, I’m just not good at it.  I am praying daily that the right thing will be presented for me and my family this year.
    • take more pictures.  I have enjoyed taking pictures since my dad taught me how to take pictures with his original Nikon, and then showed me how to develop the black and white photos in our downstairs bathroom.
    • be in more pictures.  I am not a fan of being in front of the camera.  I don’t know if it is being brought up with the idea that pride is sinful, or just my extremely poor self-esteem.  I don’t think I will ever see myself as anything other than a chubby girl, no matter my weight.  But as I get older, I realize that I don’t want to be left out of the wonderful memories in my life with my family.
    • have a better relationship with God. Enough said.
    • stand up for myself.  I think one of the reasons I have always enjoyed management was that I can stand up for others when I feel they are being wronged.  I like using that limited power for good.  But when it comes to myself, I’m horrible at fighting for what I deserve most of the time.
    • not let other’s opinions of me, question my integrity and character.
    • put myself as a priority.  This is the hardest thing for me.  Sweats should not be my staple.  I deserve to workout and shower daily.  I deserve to be the best version of me.  My family deserves the best version of me.

My list may seem a little long, but I don’t consider it a list of resolutions.  I consider it more a list of revelations, that I need to make to grow and become a better me.  But when it comes down to it, just writing this list out for anyone to see, may be the most powerful thing for me.

There is something about a new year that is exciting and hopeful.  A new day.  A new season.  A new year.  Anything seems possible.  What is your word for the year? What resolutions or revelations are waiting for you in 2018?

 

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